Time and time again, I see someone looking for suggestions, must be great and do x, y, z but “no mlm’s”… do you realize how many fantastic products they just eliminated with those two words? And why? Because they had one experience not to their satisfaction and then they paint them all with the same brush? There are bad apples in any business but that doesn’t mean the whole orchard is bad.
Wanna know if you should try a product you’ve been eyeing or your friend has been raving about? Ask yourself these questions:
- Do I trust this person?
- Do I believe their product to be of high quality?
If yes, what’s stopping you?
I can tell you that many of the products you find on the store shelves have you THINKING it’s a high quality product but they’re actually backed by marketing geniuses who know just the right words to say to make you believe it. And it’s perfectly legal. You’re voting for more of that ish every time you make a purchase.
Did you know that most of those small businesses, and yes they are small businesses, are run by women? Women who are working to contribute to their families financial situation. Paying for expensive things like student loan debt, dance studio memberships, traveling soccer fees… maybe they are a single parent or a college student with a side hustle so they can pay the bills a little easier… maybe they just want to more easily fit buying the products they love into their budget. Or maybe they’ve worked so hard that it’s now their family’s sole income.
No matter how much they’ve worked to grow their business, I’m betting they’re all grateful for a paycheck in these uncertain times. I know I sure am!
They way we buy things is changing FAST. Maybe it’s time to rethink some limiting beliefs and give some products a deeper look.
A fork in road: a metaphor, based on a literal expression, for a deciding moment in life or history when a major choice of options is required.
We’ve certainly all heard that phrase before but have you thought that this is actually where we are currently at as a global community?
Most of the time, the big deciding moments seem to come by choice through a growth period and we need to decide whether we want to continue on one path that may not be right for us anymore but is relatively comfortable or take a new, uncharted path that may seem pretty scary. Not this time. Enter: covid. I believe we’ve all been forced upon the literal fork in the road. Nobody asked for this and it’s very different for everyone but, here we are… together, with decisions to be made.
Friends, no matter how you think things should move forward as a society, the ONE THING you can actually control is how YOU move forward. Are you dwelling on the thoughts like “I just want to get back to normal”? I hate to break it to you but I do believe our old “normal” is gone for good. Some things will be forever changed when we come out of this.
So, that leaves us with the question of what do we want moving forward? What pockets of joy can you find in the NOW that you want to keep when things “open up” again? If you’re having trouble finding anything good right now, start with the simple stuff. After you’ve focused in on the small things that are gifts right now you can widen your focus to find more of the good. Even if you can’t see it yet, I promise it’s there.
WHO do you want to be? WHAT do you want more of? What are some things better left in the past? You, and you alone, have the power to decide the answer to these questions. It starts with you… the only thing you can control. Which path will you take?
Sometimes you just have to jump.
A year ago, I looked back at my sister (who was laughing her head off, btw) as I was nudged to the open door of a plane at 13k feet. This was the look I gave her.
Skydiving was on my bucket list for a LONG time and my mom, yes my MOM, was the impetus for it finally happening when it did. My 72yo mother had already jumped and I was next. There was some “WTF had I gotten myself into?” and some “holy shit, this is actually happening” and then I turned around and we were gone. No time to second guess. No time to change my mind. I had signed the papers and we were going, whether I was mentally prepared or not.
Honestly, I think that’s how we need to live our lives. Less analyzing. Less overthinking. Less worrying about what others will think. More doing, even in the face of fear.
Are there things you want to do? Adventures you want to take? Businesses you want to start? Big, scary dreams you’re dreaming of? A better level of fitness you wish to achieve? Things/people in your life that don’t bring to your life as much as they take? YOU and only you have the power to make the changes that will make room for more LIFE and LOVE and EXPERIENCES…
Sometimes we just need to JUMP, even in the face of fear.
Because, if not now, when? And, if not you, then who?
I’m no longer living my life in fear of what others will think of me or what they may or may not be expecting of me. I will no longer be a smaller version of myself because others are afraid to shine. When we shine bright, we allow others the permission to shine right alongside us. Take the risk. Make the bold move. Shine bright, my friend. JUMP.
We all end up at the same finish line at different times.
Are you feeling like life is passing you by? Each day you wake up and just go through the motions to get through the day and living for the weekends? Do you worry about having regrets in 10-20 years or more about the things you didn’t do, the experiences you didn’t have or not contributing “enough”?
Here’s the beauty of it all… even though we don’t get to choose our expiration date, we DO have the power to make small changes every day to put ourselves on the path to our bigger dreams. You don’t have to wake up one day in the last chapter of your life and wish you had done MORE.
- Want to improve your fitness? Strap on your shoes and go for that walk or do that workout.
- Not happy with your nutrition? Swap out one meal a day for a healthier option until you’re ready to take a bigger step. Not sure what a “healthier option” even means? Do some research. Empower yourself. LEARN.
- Feel like you’re not fulfilled in your career? Pick up a side hustle. Take a chance on something new.
- Maybe you just know something MORE is out there but don’t know how figure out what that is. Take a class. Listen to empowering audiobooks or podcasts. Volunteer. Book the dream vacation. Get out of your safe, little comfort zone.
- Ever feel like society is full of assholes and crazy people? Turn off the damn news (seriously). Be cautious about what media you consume. SMILE to strangers. Hold the door for people. Instead of raging about getting cutoff while driving, smile and know we are all doing our best.
Everything starts with the first step. If not now, when?
Let’s talk about the power of the MIND. You and you alone get to CHOOSE what your life looks like… what dreams you follow, what purpose your life fulfills.
My son used to cry his face off when we would go to a certain restaurant because he “didn’t like it”. For his 5th birthday, he CHOSE to go there because he somehow decided that the age of 5 was a good age to decide he liked it. Five years old and the kid was already understanding the choices he had power over.
One of the dear friends in this picture said (just over a year ago) that she had three close friends and that was enough for her. Now I think she’d miss all of the “bonus friends” you see here.
Another friend in this pic used to proudly proclaim that she hates hugs… now she accepts them because she’s DECIDED she wants to like them (we’re still working on Michelle in the middle though).
I’m in the midst of a “sober summer” because I’m choosing to. In the beginning it was HARD. I actually haven’t posted about it sooner because I was afraid I’d fail… but each day is helping it feel more “normal”. I’m totally ok now going to a brewery and having a kombucha or water. Or cocktails on the deck with friends and choosing a Ningxia mocktail instead (let’s be real… any excuse to drink more Ningxia is a-ok with me).
It’s all about choices. Not only choices in action but, choices in what you focus on… I could choose to dwell on “omg, I CAN’T have alcohol” and feel like I’m depriving myself or I can choose to focus on my health goals and what I CAN have.
The mind is more powerful than any of us realize. What small shift can you make today to free yourself from the chains of labels you’ve given yourself or accepted from others?
The best thing about getting older?
This journey of self discovery I’m on. I freaking love the me I’ve allowed myself to become.
The worst thing about getting older?
The regret that sneaks in and punches me in the gut as this journey of self discovery reminds me just how different things could have been. I could have been… a better mother. a better wife. a better daughter. a better friend.
The biggest challenge for me right now?
Forgiveness. Forgiving myself for being the best I knew how to be at the time, even when I wasn’t very good. Forgiving myself for spending my life on the damn hamster wheel, not having a fucking clue what living authentically even meant. I spent so many years doing what I was “supposed” to do, striving for perfection and feeling guilty when I failed at either. A very wise friend once told me that “guilt is a useless emotion”… while my head knew that to be true, I wasn’t ready at the time to cut the ties of guilt.
The struggle is real and has brought me to my knees more than once. Just like all of us, I’m learning as I go. I know there’s more to life than “getting by” and “I’m fine” because I’m in that new state of being now. I’m surrounded by so many forward thinking badasses that continually speak life and show me their hearts. They, like myself, want MORE. More love. More peace. More kindness. More forgiveness. More acceptance. More LIFE for all of us.
Now to go practice that forgiveness on myself for not having this influence in my life when I was a young adult/parent. I wish I could have been this “me” a little sooner. Another wise friend says that perhaps I wouldn’t have been ready to hear it sooner… Who really knows? I’m just going to have to accept that and forgive.